Regional views

Hey I got this as a forward..the second half was the reply of my friend :)
Just a light joke...nothing to hurt anyone :)

This is what I got from a Telugu friend...

What it means to have a TAMIL GIRL friend

Her mother looks down at you because you didn't study in IIT or Madras /Anna University.
Her father starts every conversation with " I say..."
She shudders if you use four letter words.
She shudders when you eat eggs.
She has long hair, neatly oiled and braided.
She uses the word 'Super' as her only superlative.
Her name is another name for a Goddess or a flower.
Her first name is longer than your first name, middle name and surname combined.
When she mixes milk and rice you are never sure whether it is for the Dog or for herself. (That is baaad!)
For weddings, she sports a mini jasmine garden on her head and wears silk saris in the Madras heat without looking too uncomfortable while you are melting in your singlet.
She thinks Arvind Swami is the sexiest man alive.
Her favorite cricketer is Kris Srikanth.
Her favorite food is dosa though she has tried North Indian snack like Chat (pronounced like the slang for ‘conversation’)
She bursts into songs with her cousins in every movie.
She bores you by telling you which raaga each song you hear is based on.
You have to give her jewels, though she has already got plenty of it.
She is more educated than you.
Her father thinks she is much smarter than you.
And he is probably right.
Note: Sorry Tamil friends


I countered it by this...below... : -) hope you enjoy..

What it means to have a UGULET GIRL friend

Her mother looks down at you because you didn't study Engineering or for not having a fake certificate which others can easily identify...
Her father starts every conversation with Dowry??... Is he a Brinjal vendor..?
She shudders if you use FIVE (DOWRY) letter words.
She hates you when you don’t eat GONGURA...and all pickles her mom has given from a 3 yrs back India trip...
She has a capability of turning anything into a pickle…even paper... Andhra style... :-) Your fate to eat it...
She has long hair, neatly oiled and braided not to make, feel her husband admire...but to offer to Tirupathi god.
She uses the word 'Bagundhi' as a standard adjective for anything even to praise you... so no value.
She breaks her first name and keeps a nick name; her last name is usually being horrible to pronounce…everyone confuses which one to use.
When she mixes milk and rice you don’t realize that it would also be like a fire hot...so spicy...Unless u taste it and go to hospital she might have used white chillis. (That is chaala baaad!).
For weddings, she doesn’t sport a mini jasmine garden on her head because she knows well that her hair is going to TIRUPATHI so why jasmine flowers wastely? Correct na…?? and wears basic cotton sari in the Guntur and save something to her dad because of dowry expenses.
She thinks Chiranjeevi and Venkatesh are the sexiest men alive. Otherwise, she knows only about Tamil heroes and movies because approx...200% Tamil movies are dubbed or remade in Telugu rgt?
Her favorite cricketer is Tendulkar...because there is no one from Guntur.
She bores you by telling you how to save $... while sleeping...too… trying to save snore? Lol.
You have to give her American life, Lexus, Acura MDX, Blackberry & always update with...Luxury stuff...so that she will balance the jewels and houses her father gave you..
But she rarely likes to buy those cars...and owns an obsolete Corolla...for her entire US life...
She is rarely educated...knows how to be a best kanjoo in the world...
Her father thinks she is much smarter than You( my telugu friend)...and he is correct... :-)

Happy Women's Day !!!

Happy Women's Day to all Women bloggers !

Felt like this is the best time to talk about what Women's liberation means in today's world.
Are we liberated ?
Ofcouse we are ! Any woman with a basic education is a liberated person and she can think for herself and can make what she wants out of her life.
Women are gifted with certain qualities that are unique and attractive and it's upto us to be liberated without losing our charm, grace and bewitching looks .
There is a cool factor associated with feminism and I wonder if there is any use in it...is'nt being sweet and charming preferable to being brash?
I love the protective attitude of males and revel in it. Let's not exploit them..but give them an oppurtunity to show that they care :P
Let's don all those colorful clothes and accessories and look our feminine selves.....
I have seen in many situations that just a curteous smile and a polite request from women work wonders...and things are easy that way :)
Girls! Let's stick up for ourselves but in the process let's not lose our gentle nature ! Happy Women's Day !

Watch out for these....

If you are living with or in close proximity to any septuagenarian (a person in his/her seventies), it is advised that you keep a close watch on their speech and actions to detect Alzheimer's disease or 'Senile-Dementia' at an early stage.

It creeps in such a slow pace which makes detecting very difficult. There are many websites that gives an idea of what symptoms to watch out for, but they just give a general idea and does not talk of signs specific to our life-style.

My grand-mother is a Dementia patient and has been deteriorating slowly for the past 3 or so years. (She was a seven year old when the photograph was taken )
Had we detected certain odd behaviors 5 years ago, we could have delayed the progress considerably.
There were isolated incidents, ones that could easily be brushed aside that we never attached much importance. And brushing aside is what we did ,which turned out to be such a ghastly mistake on our part.

Let me give you a brief idea of the kind of woman my grand-mother is. She is the one I wrote about in one of my earlier posts.
She would run her family so efficiently and also take care of the families of her daughters all at the same time.She would keep track of all that is happening in her daughters' families on a day to day basis.

I have an incident that would sum up her character and the role she played in our lives..
When my brother was in UKG or Ist standard he was asked by the tution teacher a question from Social Studies. When he was asked"Who is the head of the family?"
My brother had thought for a moment and had replied in a conclusive way
"Amamma is the head of the family !"

('Father' was the right answer in the text book..but we'll debate about that later :P )

That is how active she was..involving herself in numerous activities enthusiastically.There is so much to her that I can do a seperate post on the subject.

Around her seventieth year there were some disturbing behavior. Certain things that would not go in sync with her character ,caliber or intelligence.

The earliest was a depressive attitude. She would speak as if there was no hope even in trivial things. We thought she was complaining about her loss of physical strength and put it down to old age.

Then there would be repetitive phrases she would use..it was
"enna maa pannaradhu (What can I do!)" for every question we would pose.

She was a very active person in family functions and was in close contact with all her first ,second ,third and nth cousins.But around this time she would never show any interest in meeting people or attending weddings..this was quite a shock to most of us. My cousin was doing medicine and he was the one who detected that something was amiss. When a phsychiatrist visited her, he diagnosed it as 'Depression' and started treatment.

She was a meticulous person giving a lot of to importance to home decoration (to the extent of digging up the floor to change it with not so much as batting her eyelids).She was one person who took a lot of effort to present herself well. It was next to impossible to find a hair out of place. But she could'nt even do her hair properly and her personal hygiene took a nose-dive.

Routine work was a great challenge to her .She would forget where she kept important things and would search for them over and over .
One day while we were watching a late night movie she told me "Sree...idhu ellam poi dhaaney..ippo Meena thoongittu dhaaney irupaa?" (She was questioning why an actress was in the TV when everyone must be sleeping at that time of the day!) .
I was shocked and did'nt know what to reply.

The next blow was the way she was handling money. She would give a bunch of notes to the cable-guy or the news-paper man and would not wait for the change.
She had a bad bout of sweet-craving and would not keep track of the sweets eaten and this coupled with excess sleeping during day time and wandering in the nights was playing havoc with her overall well-being.

The last knock came when she asked my brother whether he was older or younger than me as she was a walking journal of all our lives and would give details with precision even in her sleep.
Later when we slowly questioned her about who were siblings ,who were cousins and the order of siblings she was not sure of herself.

This was the time my mother decided to change the doctor and after an MRI the doctor gave us the sad news that she was a Dementia patient and that a part of her brain was not getting enough blood supply and he changed the medication.
But even at that time she could carry on her work and was keeping a tab on the house-hold activities.

But slowly deterioration has taken its toll and now she is not able to tell even our names .But surprisingly she remembers her parents and her childhood very well and the moment she sees her father's photograph grabs it and says 'En Naina'('My
Dad'). The doctors say that they go back in time and remember their childhood vividly.

There is no cure for Dementia and the best that can be done is delaying the deterioration , keeping their area accident-proof and spending as much time with them as possible.
Prolonged medication for BP is also a contributing factor to this condition.
Watching TV serials without a break should be discouraged and activities that would exercise the brain like 'sudoku' and reading various subjects should be encouraged.

My message is this. If you spot anything..anything in your parent's or grand-parent's behavior that makes you think "I guess they are getting old"...Dont assume it's old age taking its toll..immediately consult a good Neurologist and get them tested for Dementia. Most of all try spending as much time as possible with them and be part of their world.

A Sequel to my previous post..in Tanglish..

Ravi in his comments ,reminded me of 'waters in the dark' of which I convieniently forgot in my previous post.

//seeing a huge water body (river, lake or sea) in the night gives me an eeiry feeling// was part of his comment.
I think I can perfectly understand that feeling.


Oru vaati Kumarakom(Kerala) la, the resort had arranged something called 'angling in the night'(andha maari perla edho)..The way it was expalained in the hotel..it sounded like great fun.
Sarinnu..naan soora puli maari..
'Naan thatha voda evalo fishing poyee irukken..hmm aanaa naan ponadhu ellam
'Big game'..idhu enamo small range maari irukku nnu' oru alatal.. (enga thatha naan avaroda pona podhu 14 kgs fishes pidichi irukaaru..naannum adhu kitta poyee tasteaa irukkumaa , fry yaa illa kuzhambaa..nnu paathu irukken..).

'Hey folks..but I know all about baits for little fishes' adhu idhu nnu en 'angling' ariva ellam kaanpichen. Enga thatha small game pogum podhu..bait kku evalo groundnut+ idly+ 'all sorts of other things' paste seidhu ,'urundai' pidichu veyyilla kaaya vechee iruppen!!! (Idly is the binding agent..dont even let me talk about 'all sorts of other things' :) ore Non-veg smell vandhudum :P..enga kootalikku vera pidikaadhu :P)

Oru 9 manikku gumballa kilambinom.
The hotel guy took us to a daaaarkk..marshyyy..bamboo(or something similar) filled area with the help of a lantern..light taa 'ooooshh..ooosh' nu oru sound. That guy made us climb down a slope (appavey enakku idhu saripadumaannu doubt..ovvoru step pum spelt .E.E.R.I.E.), and he took us to a creek..ennamo back waters maari..and there was a kattamaran anchored there..naan lantern a paarthen..kattumaratha paathen..bamboos paathern..pakkathila irukaravanga mogam kooda theriyala...

Kattumaram mela ellam thanni.. anga anga 'algae' .(kamal sonna maari paasam mighundha kattumaram!). Kattumarathukku 'Paasam' irundhu enna use..kooda vandha gumbalukku illaye..Sigh!!!

Boatman na paathu..'ivida enna meen kittu..aaapudum ?' nnu oru malayamil la ketten..
Avar malayalathula ninaichee irupaaru..'adhu theriyadhu aana ,inga irukka meenungalukku innaiki enna kidaikum nnu enakku theriyum' nnu.
Enakku mattum oru 10 minutes aavey visions of 'Anaconda'.Adhula nightla vara scenes...
I could'nt even go near that Kattamaran..Some kind of fear was gripping me.

Enga gumballa kooda yaraiyavadhu sacrifice pannanumna first choice yaarunnu enakku theriyum...adhula mattum difference of opinion varadhu.

"illa..I dont know abt baits for fishes in backwaters( read it "I DONT WANT to be a bait" )..
"You see daa... S ....(engaloda epavaadhu fishing vara en cousin brother..a.k.a 'dhrogee')..
Namba 'low tide high tide' edhuvumey calculate pannama poga maatom illa, sun rise,sun set time kooda paakala ..what say you? " innu ketten.
Avan 'Endee..raathiri 9 manikku rising..setting time avasiyamaa.. idhu ellam oru pozhapaa...irudee innimey neeti muzhakee pesuva illa..' maari oru cheap paarvai vittutu..
'Un ishtam sree...decide pannu' nnan.

Adutha second naan 'about turn!..1.2.3..1 !' nnu baltee.
Aana boat man num hotel aalum..'endha..nyee..entha interest vilichee..ippa ennadayingil..nyan.. innum poyengil lake varum..nannayittu irukkim ' andha maari ore 'nasal' dialogues.
This waters is two to the power of infinity much..'nyaan varalaa' nnu innum koncham nasala sollitten..
Enga gumbalum..'soora puliye jagaa vaangidhichee..namba emmatharam'nu adhungalum 'about turn!'.
Medhuva nadandhu hotel vandhu serndhom..'Emaathitaan daa !' nnu naan sonnadhukku ellarum 'Vaa Vaa unakku nalaikku irukudhu' nnu kannaalaye sollitu poitaanga.

(But the next day turned out to be exhilarating with a speed boat ride in lake 'Vembanadu'. Appo appo 'S' kku edhavadhu pazhee vaangum ennam varudhaannu paarthen..avar Asinodavo..Nayanodavo 'malayaala karai oram'nnu manasula duet la irundhaaru..hee hee naanum indha oru vaati disturb pannala :P).

I did not get to see the same 'angling' creek in day time..had I, probably I would have felt differently..
afterall.. "Naan enga thathavoda evalo Big games poyee iruppen !!! " :)

Here I come...

Each person has his/her own passion...something they cannot resist..that which pulls them inspite of common-sense saying a big Noo...u can call it a weakness...

I get into that trance when I am near clear waters. Be it a swimming pool..a clear lake..a stream..a pond...even a small tank near a field which is fed with a pump-set.
It need not neccessarily be a deep pool..just a wide tank filled with cool water would do...hmm..but the regular bath tubs are not in the list..they are so narrow and well... restricting I guess.

While riding in a boat (only the speed ones would do) or when I am gazing into flowing waters...I can literally feel a tug..as if mysterious hands are pulling me...its like I cant think clearly and there are two 'me s'....and one of 'me' is already in the water.

(hmm..I find it a great feat to manage just one 'me', imagine handling two :-) ).

Sometimes when I am near 'not so safe' waters like tall falls or swirling rivers ..one of 'me' ( the still sane one..) drags the other one forcibly.

The waters that take the cake are flowing crystal clear streams and deep blue lakes.
The feeling one gets while coming up from the deep is akin to no other feeling...pure bliss..

Well there are only two kinds of water that puts me off..the murky kind and the one with debris.

So..the moment I see water...I say...
"Here I come...."

--A poem by Alfred Lord Tennyson

My all time favorite...such moving words..
so much like listening to a melancholy tune...

Home they brought her warrior dead:
She nor swooned, nor uttered cry:
All her maidens, watching, said,
‘She must weep or she will die.’

Then they praised him, soft and low,
Called him worthy to be loved,
Truest friend and noblest foe;
Yet she neither spoke nor moved.

Stole a maiden from her place,
Lightly to the warrior stepped,
Took the face-cloth from the face;
Yet she neither moved nor wept.

Rose a nurse of ninety years,
Set his child upon her knee—
Like summer tempest came her tears—
‘Sweet my child, I live for thee.’

without using so many words, it portrays the sorrow of the wife..her obstinacy to die..bringing out the love for her hero..
The poet builds the drama, getting us worried about the wife...then finally shows us what makes her break..
The stanza
"Rose a nurse of ninety years,
Set his child upon her knee—
Like summer tempest came her tears—
‘Sweet my child, I live for thee.’"

is a seperate poem by itself.....
When everything else fails to ivoke a response ,an elderly woman who is portrayed as an expert in understanding emotions...senses the wife's instincts..
'Set his child upon her knee—'
the precious gift he has left her makes her break down!

This is one poem where the poet takes you on an emotional tour !

A Modern Gurukulam

While everyone is talking about the pros and cons of Indian Education system, the innovative way founded by Shri.Jiddu Krishnamoorthy came to my mind.

I had the great oppurtunity of visiting Rishi Valley School near Madanapalle (AP) many times and its I should say I was very lucky to get a real insight into the system of education followed in the school.

The school looks like a village from a Bharathiraja film and it is said that the great location with majestic hills with a view of plush green valleys was hand-picked by the founder himself . The climate is pleasant throughout the year and a visit to the school is like taking a vacation in some exotic hill station.

The guest houses look like old Madras Bungalows and the dorms are in a similar style giving the entire place an old world charm.
You are surrounded by chirping birds which reminds you that the place is a bird sanctuary and any RVite passing by would stop and answer your queries about the birds.

The two aspects that impressed me are, there are no day scholars in the school (except the kids of the staff ) and so everyone is on equal grounds and the next one is that all the teachers live in the campus .This is a great advantage to the school as they can make a complete impact on the students without any outside influence. No day scholar telling her boarder friends " Hey..I went to a party yesterday and......" ..

What I saw was a homogeneous mix of kids from different regions and from various walks of lives ..you name them...they have them..diff languages..diff religions and diff races and even mixed races.... What a
blend ! It feels wonderful to see all these kids play together in great hrmony.

They have no uniforms, no exams upto 8th standard, have classes like yoga , batik , carpentry , bird-watching and pottery.
Visitors are not allowed to dip their fingers in clay :( while the students there were happily operating the electric wheel and were blissfully making pots and were thoroughly enjoying themselves.
The happiness I could see in their faces... a million pounds cannot bring that. (This promptly sent me to Golden Bridge Pottery in Podicherry to enquire if there are any classes there...but no luck :( )

Although there is no uniform they have an unwritten dress code and wear appropriate clothes for different activities.Instead of exams , they have assignments and projects. I saw a 5th standard child ('fifthie' as they put it ) going around the campus asking other students what brand of shoes they were using and making a pie-chart with all the data collected. What a way to learn...! I mentally yelled at everyone who made me do tonnes of exercises in text books to understand the concept.

The classes are not always conducted in class rooms...one can see groups of student and a teacher seated under trees ,on stone benches or on long steps that are fixed here and there. The teacher would be in the centre while all the students would be seated around him/her in such a relaxed manner (as if they were watching a TV show! ). You can even see a bunch of them sharing the book with the teacher reclining on him/her.
Would you believe me if I tell you one little boy was swinging on a banyan (ariel) root during a class and the teacher was patiently calling out to him repeatedy? What rapport they have ..there is absolutely no fear or false respect in the children's faces. Just open minds and happy learning. I always think that only people who have a passion for children, nature and teaching go to Rishi Valley to teach there. There are many teacher who are RV products themselves.I have also seen some acadamecians who stay in RV for a few months and take pleasure in teaching the kids their subject.

Kids call the lady teachers and staff 'Akka' ..no 'Miss' ,'Ma'am' or 'Miss.Jones' there. They have a unique drawl to their 'Akka' pouring all their love into it. No standing up and bidding 'good morning's..just a 'Hi...Akkaaa.' . Even when I stop to talk to RVites ..their dialogues are always generously sprinkled with 'Akka's.

The library looks so inviting and using the Library is part of the curriculam and each child is expected to share his views in class.
Have you heard of a school which invites a teacher from the UK to tell stories and to teach the nuances of story-telling ? No wonder the kids had such great communication skills.

Importance of recycling and use of biodegradable material is not just a text book topic there and the use of plastic and polythene bags are prohibited.. Beats me how the kids dont complain but follow it in such a positive way.

Wild life preservation, enviromental awareness, appreciation of nature ,
kindness to animals are areas which are concentrated upon.Even the snakes (that are found commonly) are caught and taken away to be left loose in a remote area.

There is a hill called 'Astachal' and everyone gathers there at the same time every evening and in cloud of 'Sambrani' smoke to chase away the mosquitos sit there in absolute silence and watch the sun set. I was reminded of this

"The birds have vanished into the sky,
and now the last cloud drains away.

We sit together , the mountain and me,
until only the mountains remains."

____ Li Po


The education does not stop with the school but also extends to the hostel life.All the snacks the kids bring are collected together and shared equally. I was surpried to see that the living quarters are swept and mopped by the kids themselves . Dignity of labour at work. Most important of all...the boys are included too.I have seen teen-age boys doing the dishes with blaring music in the background and wonder of wonders enjoying the chore.

There is no topic that is taboo and the kids talk about anything under the sun with their teachers , all while walking around the school in the evenings.

Workshops are conducted by experts in the field.For example, Hindustani music by Bombay Jayashree....films by..who else but our ManiRatnam ,wild life conservation by Sekar dataatri are just a few in the long list.

But there are some criticisms about the system too...many ppl say that, these kids are brought up in a simulated environment and hence would find it difficult to face the real world. Well..I personally feel that the kids are fine and have no adjustment problems.After all being street-smart or pushy does not really help in the long run. Kindness, altruism, team spirit, generosity are no trivial traits and they never go unrewarded.

What better way to widen the mind than keeping them happy and making the learning experience a pleasant one..As the saying goes, if no learning is achieved , the teacher has failed more..It makes sense to see if the kids are in a receptive mood before teaching anything..

I sincerely feel that we should have more of these kinds of schools and also the final board exams should be modified to suit these schools.

I remeber reading an interview by actor Nandita Das in which she says her ultimate ambition is to set up a school like Rishi Valley. We need more of such people to better our existing system.