Got this by mail from a friend.......
How does an English professor speak English
1.Don't dare to talk in front of my back!
2.Both of you three get out of the class!
3.Why are you so late… say yes or no!
4.Take 5 cm wire of any length! [Best one!!!]
5.I have two daughters. Both of them are girls!!
6.All of u stand in a straight circle
7.Quite… the principal just passed away...
8.Why are you looking at the monkey outside the window when I am here.
Just for laughs :)